Step 1:State a specific behavior you do not like. “I don’t like it when you…” Examples of specific behaviors: Example A:“…show up late.” Example B:“…ignore deadlines.” |
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Step 2:State your overall desire. “What I most want…” Example A:“…is for you to be more reliable about time.” Example B:“…is for you to be a team member others can count on.” |
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Step 3:State specific changes in behaviors “I want…” “…you to be ready to leave early enough to see the previews when we go to a movie.” Example B:“…you to commit to deadlines you truly feel you can keep and are committed to.” “…you to be accountable to renegotiate deadlines or suggest option for meeting them.” |
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Step :Then ask:“Are you willing?” |